Mom

I smelled you today. Is that weird? It seemed weird at the time... even now its weird to think about, but its all I have been able to think about since it happened. It was so amazing - so many feelings went through me at once, overwhelmed, disturbed, shocked, surprised, happy, sad and all I could think about was for you to never leave again. I know you were there. It made me stop for a minute and catch my breath. Your perfume is something I will never forget - it reminds me of you, I usually am in a public place when I smell it and can find the woman wearing it, but to be hit with the smell so strong and no one else to be around threw me off. I kept sniffing trying to find you again, but you were only here for a fleeting moment, almost a reminder, but I don't need a reminder to think of you, you are never far from my thoughts.

I felt crazy thinking it was you, I looked around just to make sure no one else was around that I could have been smelling their perfume, but I was in an empty parking lot where only men work. There was no one else there. I sat in my car for a few minutes crying and wished I could have stayed there forever if it meant keeping you with me. I will never quite understand how you were picked. I know it is a great honor to be an Angel and to have the ability to watch over all of your babies at once, but I was not ready to let you go.

I've seen you in the store too, and I get so excited to run up to you and hug you and tell you everything I've had to hold in. Only to get to you and be so sadly disappointed when someone else turns around and wonders who the weirdo is standing there. 

I have so desperately wanted you to visit me in the last 6 years. I thought maybe you had forgotten me, but today proved to me you are still here with me. 

I hope you will come and see me again - please don't wait six more years. I don't think I can take it if you do! You gave a small glimpse of how it feels and I want it again! I smelled you today and I miss it already!
I love you and I miss you!
Dana