Team sports

I know we are not alone on our thinking , but I also know there are a lot of people who don't share the same thoughts.

When our children ask to play team sports, we have rules. Simple rules that we require them to agree to.

1. Grades have to be kept up.

2. When you volunteer/agree to play a team sport,  you have to go to all of the practices.

3. You go to all of the games and you give it your all. 

4. You don't get to quit halfway through the season because you don't like it,  your coach or your teammates. You agreed to play a team sport and your team is counting on you. The more you practice/play the better you will get and the more playing time you will get.

 

Those are pretty basic.  We are trying to teach our kids that if you agree to something that other people are counting on you for,  you can't just quit or not show up because you don't want to or something better or more fun came along.

Sometimes,  I hate living by our "rules". There are a lot of days I would love to break our rules - but what does that teach my kids?

Darin is our youngest and last child at home.  He loves hockey and when he asked to play last year,  we knew it was going to wreak havoc on our Christmas plans and while I would love to say it is ok to miss two weekends of games and all of the practices in between, it's not. 

For one he needs all of the ice time he can get and two,  there are 15 players and 1 goalie on his team. 

That sounds like a lot,  but hockey is demanding and it takes a lot out of you (like most sports), so when one player doesn't show up, it screws with the entire team. Now think if you decide to skip a game and a couple of your teammates decide to skip the same game, it leaves a handful to try and play. It's not fair to your remaining teammates and you grow up thinking if you don't show up its 'OK', someone else can handle it. (at the same time - don't overschedule your children, where they have to pick between hockey or basketball or wrestling etc., that puts them in a position to not show up for one or the other.)

Now fast forward to being an adult  - you can't just 'not show up for work' - people are counting on you. Its the same concept and if you allow them to do it as children, you are teaching them bad behaviors that will continue when they become adults.

Maybe we are wrong, maybe we ask too much.  But why not start teaching them that life isn't all about them and that other people do count on them to be there when they say they will.